Having one of THOSE days...

I seem to be getting to that point where I am letting everything get to me, usually it takes longer than 11 days. Seems like nothing is working out for me the way I need it to and I always end up crying and wishing I could just sleep the next 6 months away.

I need to focus on other things, instead of just focusing on all the negative aspects of my life.  So instead of focusing on how overweight I am, I need to put all my focus on how to get into the body I want.  Instead of focusing on how alone I am, I should me thinking of all the friends we have surrounding us. I need to focus on how amazing I am going to feel when I see my love again. 

Adjusting to life as a single parent......

While technically I am not a single mother, not having my husband around makes it feel that way.  We have made it to day 9 of him being deployed, while it isn't making the ache in my heart go away, we have all learned to adjust.  The kids still ask about daddy and when he is coming home, but it is happening less everyday.

A few things I have learned since being married to a soldier:

• with the army, you will always be waiting(even if they aren't deployed)
• distance only makes your love stronger
• worrying about little things will drive you crazy(and make you fight)
• it never gets any easier
• focusing on your goals will make the time apart go faster
• hearing his voice will always make you cry
• its ok to breakdown, but then get over it

There are days I don't even want to get out of my bed, but I know that I have a job to do.  I am working on bettering myself, taking care of the kids and also the house will not happen if I choose to feel sorry for myself.  To keep myself busy i have made a list of things to do and a list to do with the kids.

Deployment Sucks!!!

  So the first full day of my husband being deployed is coming to an end.  It's been 3 years since his last deployment, so I am not used to being separated for more than a couple weeks(for trainings or trips home) 6 months is going to be a very long time for us to be apart.  The first deployment was pretty easy, we were engaged, I was living at home with my parents and spending the whole time planning our wedding.  The second one was harder, we fought the whole time, plus I was pregnant and extremely emotional.  We came close to getting divorced but I am so thankful that we worked out our differences, I don't know what I would do without him.


   I plan to do things differently this time.  Crafts with the kids, sending monthly boxes to my husband, de-cluttering and straightening our house.  And working on my weight.  Emily is doing great in school and i'm hoping to teach Joey some new words, I actually think he said ball today so I think that or cup will be the first word we work on, maybe both.